A few excerpts from the Cynic’s Dictionary

Entertainment Industry- A vast network of business empires whose role is to divert us as society crumbles, and to accelerate the crumbling so that we require more diversion. Comparable to the band that played aboard the Titan, except that in this case they've also supplied the iceberg.

Evolution- A biological relay race hurtling onward and occasionally upward from the ancient muck, as trilobites and pterodactyls pass the baton to aardvarks and claims adjusters.

Nerd- A poor ungainly misfit, usually a male adolescent, who is scorned and ostracized by his peers for failure to cultivate a sexually knowing persona--until he graduates from engineering school and secures his first job at twice their salary. One who finds refuge in personal computer and ranks mathematics above style in the eternal hierarchies.
//Also Geek- A nerd without mathematical aptitude

Politician- A bundle of gaseous ambition cleverly packaged as a public servant or a corporate sales manager.

RatRace- Popular metaphor used to depict the Darwinian struggle for survival, esp. in the business world; a lifelong marathon in which the laurels go to the fastest and cleverest rats.




That should suffice for now. Sometimes I get lost in these utterly hilarious and witty definitions. The author is Rick Bayan and he's nothing short of a pure genius. For anybody interested, the Cynic's Dictionary can be found at http://www.i-cynic.com